Comments
I didn’t make it through the first half an hour of the first one, I doubt I will even bother trying to watch this one on HBO.
I saw the first one and it was horrible. How the hell can you make a movie about giant robots beating the shit out of each other and have it be BORING?!?!
The only spots of amusement in the long, dull, stupid first installment:
1) a hot chick wearing glasses because it makes her look more Science.
2) a member of a species of identical-looking automatons from another galaxy acting like the “black” stereotype. He breakdances! He talks funky-talk! He is named Jazz! He came 150 million light years to disrespect his own people! What the fuck?!
3) Megatron, frozen in ice for millions of years, thawing out in the present day and immediately bellowing “I AM MEGATRON!” before he even got a nanosecond to take in his surroundings. Was he attempting to declare his identity to the glaciers?
I didn’t loathe the first one for 2 reasons:
- I was too old for Transformers when they came out so I didn’t have any particular childhood memory attachment to them and could just watch this as a ridiculous popcorn movie.
- The CGI was not as horrible as it could have been, but I think that was more a result of the sound editing since they did a good enough job of capturing what I would assume would be the horrific sounds of clanging, scraping metal involved in machines that big and unwieldy. Typically what irks me about CGI is that it’s far too seemless and fluid compared to how things (even pretend things which don’t exist in the real world) actually move.
Nothing worse than the first movie. The scene where the Autobots are tip-toeing around the kid’s yard to hide from his parents infuriates me. Fuck that movie and fuck this new one.
Someone just told me this one is more racist than the last one. Hey, Justin, didn’t you come up with calling Jazz Basketbot instead? These guys came up with another name!
Sambots. Think about it. Maybe take off the “ts.”
From another review concerning the “Twins.”
“They speak in clichéd urban slang, tossing around phrases like ‘I’m gonna pop a cap in your ass’ while fist bumping and mumbling unintelligently in a voice that sounds like a bad Chappelle Show sketch. Then you get a close up. And they each have bug eyes and a gold tooth. Then there’s this jackass comment about them not being able to read. My jaw was on the floor.”
Other reviews:
“one of the transformers has a beard and walks with a cane. but he can transform into shit.”
“Like watching paint dry while getting hit over the head with a frying pan!”
“transformers fart and have giant metal balls”
“Bay’s most unrestrained and ridiculous to date.The male teenage cinematic equivalent of snorting cocaine off a hooker’s ass. "
“After 149 minutes, I felt like I had been sitting in an aluminum garbage can while someone drummed on the outside with a wrench. "